2022 Nissan Patrol Super Safari: Old School Never Looked So Cool

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Let’s get one thing out of the way: the 2022 Nissan Patrol Super Safari doesn’t care about touchscreen sizes, ambient lighting, or massaging seats. While the rest of the SUV world is busy trying to out-luxury each other, the Super Safari is out here doing what it’s always done - climbing dunes, crossing wadis, and laughing in the face of terrain that would send a Range Rover into panic mode. This isn’t just a car - it’s an icon. And in a world of overly polished everything, that counts for a lot.

 

There’s nothing shy about the way the Super Safari looks. It’s got the charm of a military-grade fridge with chrome highlights - and that’s meant in the best possible way. The squared-off bodywork, classic round headlights, roof rails, and those unmistakable retro decals aren’t pretending to be something they’re not. This isn’t urban camouflage - it’s a uniform. High ground clearance, chunky side steps, and steel-look bumpers let you know it’s built for a purpose. While most SUVs look like they’re heading to a school pickup, this one looks like it’s ready to disappear into the Empty Quarter with a goat and a jerry can.

 

Inside, it’s as honest as the exterior suggests. No fancy stitched dashboards or complicated touch panels - just leather-trimmed seats, big buttons, and a layout designed to be used with dusty hands in the middle of nowhere. The materials are durable, not delicate, and every control feels like it was made to last a lifetime, or at least a few thousand desert crossings. Still, Nissan hasn’t left it in the 90s completely. There’s a 7-inch infotainment screen with navigation and Bluetooth, plus automatic climate control that’s more than up to the task of UAE summers. And space? Let’s just say if you can’t fit your camping gear, recovery kit, and a week’s worth of karak supplies in here, you’re doing it wrong.

 

Here’s where the Super Safari really separates itself from the pack. Under the bonnet is a naturally aspirated 4.8L inline-six that sounds like it belongs in a light aircraft. It delivers 280 horsepower and a meaty 451 Nm of torque - not lightning fast, but perfectly tuned for crawling over rocks, pulling out your mate’s stuck Jeep, or charging up a sand dune like a rhino in running shoes. The 5-speed auto gearbox is basic, yes, but it’s tough and proven. Locking differentials, low-range gearing, and heavy-duty suspension round off a drivetrain built to survive the apocalypse - and look good doing it. Approach and departure angles are generous, the chassis is practically unbreakable, and the ride feels planted, even when the road beneath you is more theory than fact.

 

The 2022 Super Safari isn’t trying to be modern - it’s trying to be unbreakable. And it largely succeeds. It’s not for everyone, but that’s kind of the point. It’s for those who crave the raw, analogue feel of a proper off-roader. The kind of person who prefers trail dust over polish, torque over tech. If you’re after a daily commuter with wireless charging and a panoramic sunroof, this isn’t your SUV. But if you want something that’ll take you out into the wild, bring you back, and laugh at everything in between? Then welcome to the legend.

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